What a weekend.

So this weekend was extravagent, unbelievably amazing. Friday night I went out with my two best friends to a hookah bar. I don't know what its called but it was fun to get out the house for a while. It's funny that night I was out till one just to be up at five to go to my gfs house Saturday. That day was ok, considering I had to help move some things. But in return I got the while day with Kristyl. She is so funny, we watched warm bodies finally! And actually watched it, I say this because we usually sit down and criticize the damn movie.
And then memorial day, wow. We went fishing, overall a perfect day. Turns out I am old enough foe the adult swim, lol I forgot I was nineteen, and that was fucking awesome. Ahhhhh I love my life.
Btw my girlfriend never caught a fish before and yesterday she caught a bass!!!! Lol she was so scared.

Late night post

It's late.....well for me at least. You know this one will not be long, but I promise the next one will be. Most likely tomorrow after I go fishing. Here are some pics from.my weekend!!!!
I went out with some friends, met a fan, and spent a day with the love of my life.

Here are some pictures from the week!!!!

Enjoy!
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Rip Oklahoma victims

Just out of respect for those who have died in Oklahoma, I'm not posting for the next three days. Please take a moment to just pray for them.
Hope for the best,
Prepare for the worst.
-stateofwake

I am a cat lover, and I do not like to run

Yes, I love cats. I have one. And to be honest I never thought I would be a cat lover. I don't know what made me fall for her.....maybe it was her eyes. You know cats have a funny way of showing affection. With me, no one else can know she loves me. During the day we are mortal enemies, but early morning she will claw at my door. Place her paws under it and pull and cry for me to open it. She has her routine just like me.....or maybe its only because she knows I'm the first one up, and can give her food.....yep that's it. Well here she is! Say hi to bonnie v'larios.

About my weekend

well my weekend went pretty good. I went over to my girlfriends house and had some good quality time with her and her family. Today I think I'm going to start focusing on the good times that me and Kristyl have. I got to spend most of the day with her, cleaning her room helping her organize and sitting down on the couch watching God knows what. her aunt is hilarious because she says we're going to have nachos for dinner and instead we had tacos. Then we would sit down and talk about the future things we want to do, the things we want for us. We watched a movie, before I knew it the time flew right on by. I miss her. I love her. But I am grateful for the time spent. Her family is awesome.
PS the pictures are a little weird and one of them we look like we're making constipated faces, but really they are zombie faces

What a day

So today I am going to my gf house. Yes! I finally get away from my own home for a day. Don't you guys just enjoy a day off? My question to you is what are you guys doing?

CASH MONEY!

TODAY WAS PAYDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OH YESH HARD WORK DOES FUCKING PAY OFF!

Why do some people wear a mask? It is one thing I never could understand.
To build this wall around who you really are and or feel.
I said to myself I would never be that way, because that just wasn't me.
But now I do see. Its my body's way of coping. My mind's inner peace.
As I have told you guys before I try to be a very simple man.
Living an easy going life. But truth is life gets very.......stressful
I used to see kristyl every morning and every afternoon.
Then I started going to school.
Still could see kristyl in the mornings and afternoon.
Class did not start until ten o clock.
Then her debate coach started giving her shit and made it almost
impossible for me to see her.
I had to start hiding.
but none the less I still went to see her
every morning and every afternoon.
Then  her family started treating her like shit
telling her she cant even hug me. That I was not allowed to go up
to the school to see her.
I was laughing when she told me that.
Because my brother goes to the high school as well.
If some shit goes down with him it is my responsibility to get him.
Anyway I still went to see her. Sure I had to hide more and more,
but nothing in the world could stop me.
Then I became an ambassador started eating at my time more but I still
saw kristyl.
Then I got blessed with a job!
It was a Monday I heard. and still went to go see kristyl.
But her debate coach's little bitch friend saw me and told the coach.
She pretty much went and complained to the only person
who was helping me and kris.
and threatened him to losing his job.
but there were ways around that.
I could no longer go during school hours but after school hours.
But work prevented me from seeing her after school.
cutting into my valuable time with her.
Since she lives so far away it takesher an hour to get from
her house to school.
so i got up at 6 and was there waiting for her until 730
just to see her for maybe five minutes.
five minutes...........
and now I cant see her at all.
I was ungrateful for that five minutes.
Now I try to hide the pain from everyone.
but my closest friends can see right past it.
my mother and my brother.
After being on the phone with her it is hard
not to cry. because I am so in love with her.
sigh.........
I have to go to work now. Until next time guys!

Dear K

Dear K

You are the world to me.
Even when the world doesn't know it.
Somehow, in some fucked up ways,
we found each other.
Through sadness
                Despair
                        faithlessness
            Hopelessness
Somehow we found each other.
We started off as strangers.
As that young lady whom I didn't know.
That young lady that caught my eye.

I won't Lie to you,
I was incoherent to my heart
disobedient to what I felt.
Trying to ignore the feelings.

Somehow we found each other
We became best friends.
That crazy woman whom I could scream
to the top of my lungs in public with,
looking like complete idiots.
That crazy woman whom I hurt.

I won't lie to you.
It hurt me everyday when I saw you
with someone whom i knew would
break your heart
make you cry
someone who wouldn't treat you
like I would.

Somehow we found each other
We stopped talking.
That crazy woman whom I loved
and started to hate.

I won't lie to you
In the lowest of my low
I lost all hope.
I was so sad,
that I took a loaded .45 to my head
and pulled the trigger.

Somehow we found each other
That stranger whom I knew
That person,
whom was my best friend
and the one
I wanted to be mine.

I won't lie to you
I blamed everyone else
for me being alive.
god, destiny, death himself.
and even you.
I needed to forget.

Somehow we found each other
Friends restored
that friend whom no matter what
I refused to lose again.

I won't lie to you
I did many things to get your attention
sleeping with many girls
and flirting with many others
Even tried to forget all the pain
purposly.

Time flew by, I graduated
leaving for the army
thinking that that was it.
doomed to be alone. forever.

I didnt hear from anyone
didnt  leave my house.
i gave up on it all.
and thought to just accept it.
then something in my heart
said

begin again.

Somehow we found eeach other
as lovers.
as true lovers
as best friends
as one whole.

I won't lie to you.
You are the single greatest thing
that has ever happened to me.
I refuse to treat you like anyone else has.
I refuse to ever lose you.
I refuse to let myself get down and discouraged.
I refuse to ever let you feel that way.
because.....

I love you.
And you are mine
as I am yours
Yours in eternity
Forever & beyond that.
In life and even in death.

-Yours truly J

Hard Work

Those who believe hard work pays off! I commend you! because you must have some great sense of persistence. I am very tired with my new schedule. 6 am to 8 pm not fun at all. I wish i was not so blind to see how hard my parents worked when i was younger. maybe i would not be so overwhelmed with the tired-ness i feel. But the work will pay off. even if it means i cannot see kristyl anymore. only the weekends.
geez that sucks. I hope i have the strength to continue on.
know what i mean?