Dear K

Dear K

You are the world to me.
Even when the world doesn't know it.
Somehow, in some fucked up ways,
we found each other.
Through sadness
                Despair
                        faithlessness
            Hopelessness
Somehow we found each other.
We started off as strangers.
As that young lady whom I didn't know.
That young lady that caught my eye.

I won't Lie to you,
I was incoherent to my heart
disobedient to what I felt.
Trying to ignore the feelings.

Somehow we found each other
We became best friends.
That crazy woman whom I could scream
to the top of my lungs in public with,
looking like complete idiots.
That crazy woman whom I hurt.

I won't lie to you.
It hurt me everyday when I saw you
with someone whom i knew would
break your heart
make you cry
someone who wouldn't treat you
like I would.

Somehow we found each other
We stopped talking.
That crazy woman whom I loved
and started to hate.

I won't lie to you
In the lowest of my low
I lost all hope.
I was so sad,
that I took a loaded .45 to my head
and pulled the trigger.

Somehow we found each other
That stranger whom I knew
That person,
whom was my best friend
and the one
I wanted to be mine.

I won't lie to you
I blamed everyone else
for me being alive.
god, destiny, death himself.
and even you.
I needed to forget.

Somehow we found each other
Friends restored
that friend whom no matter what
I refused to lose again.

I won't lie to you
I did many things to get your attention
sleeping with many girls
and flirting with many others
Even tried to forget all the pain
purposly.

Time flew by, I graduated
leaving for the army
thinking that that was it.
doomed to be alone. forever.

I didnt hear from anyone
didnt  leave my house.
i gave up on it all.
and thought to just accept it.
then something in my heart
said

begin again.

Somehow we found eeach other
as lovers.
as true lovers
as best friends
as one whole.

I won't lie to you.
You are the single greatest thing
that has ever happened to me.
I refuse to treat you like anyone else has.
I refuse to ever lose you.
I refuse to let myself get down and discouraged.
I refuse to ever let you feel that way.
because.....

I love you.
And you are mine
as I am yours
Yours in eternity
Forever & beyond that.
In life and even in death.

-Yours truly J